


Absence Makes Everything Better

by VWebb



Category: Naruto
Genre: Allusions to Child Rape/Murder offscreen, But not so many words, I threw canon timeline out the window, It didn't make sense anyways, M/M, Romance, Senju Hashirama gets better, Senju Hashirama is oblivious, Senju Tobirama notices things, Slow Burn, Super Slow Burn using lots of time skips, Uchiha Izuna is a monster, Uchiha Izuna is dead, Uchiha Madara doesn't know that, Uncomfortable Beginning, Very Tobirama and Madara centric
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:21:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26056393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VWebb/pseuds/VWebb
Summary: The Village is coming together, but it's not hard for Tobirama to see that Madara is falling apart.  He might not really like him, but Madara is still his brother's friend and fellow dreamer.  Tobirama absolutely did NOT regret killing Izuna.  But he'd been watching and aside from the general Uchiha-ness, Madara didn't seem like such a bad person.Hashirama was sticking his head in the sand and pretending everything was alright.  Madara was going crazy.  Everyone else was content to ignore what was going on right in front of them.  Tobirama heaved a sigh and started planing.
Relationships: Senju Tobirama/Uchiha Madara
Comments: 178
Kudos: 613





	1. Hikaku Has His World Turned Upside Down

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Go Home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16790896) by [dahtwitchi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dahtwitchi/pseuds/dahtwitchi). 
  * Inspired by [Restricted Work] by [notbug (KageKashu)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KageKashu/pseuds/notbug). Log in to view. 



> They are both wonderful series. I only included the links for the first installments. But inspiration really came from the entire series for both. 'Home is where the Heart is' by dahtwitchi & 'Reconciliation-verse (or: Madara is kinda Crazy. Everyone's learning to live with it.)' by DanyellaSkylerSilverfire, notbug (KageKashu)
> 
> I'm not finished with this. Who knows how fast the chapters will come out.
> 
> WARNING!: Child rape and murder mentioned

“You’re being cruel to Madara.”

“What? No, I’m not! How can you say such a thing!”

“Anija.”

“Madara is my best friend! I would never be mean to him!” Frantically shifting fabric was heard, “how can you say that, little brother? What, did he say something to you? Oh, I have to go…”

“Anija!” Tobirama snapped.

“What Tobirama, I have to find Madara! I have to… did he say something? Is that why he’s been so…”

“Hashirama! Sit down!”

Hikaku, who had stopped in his approach to the door at the first mention of Madara’s name jumped at the snap in Senju Tobirama’s voice. It was rare for the composed, some would say emotionless, man to yell at anyone, let alone Hashirama. Biting scorn and sarcasm as he enumerated people’s faults was Tobirama’s usual way of expressing anger; shouting was unusual.

A thump from inside the Hokage’s office indicated that Hashirama had sat down hard in his chair.

“If Izuna was still alive would you encourage Miaka to be his friend? Would you encourage her to get to know him, spend time with him?”

“…”

“What about Hitomi or Aina, little Toboe? If they had lived, would you expect any of them to make friends with Izuna?

Hikaku tried to understand what he was hearing. Who was Miaka, or these other women? What did they have to do with Izuna?

“I killed Izuna. I don’t regret it, he was a monster and the world is a better place with him gone. But Madara doesn’t know that. To Madara, Izuna was his beloved little brother who could do no wrong.”

Hikaku clenched his hands in rage, Izuna had been one of his closest friends along with Madara. To hear the Senju talk about his death so coldly was infuriating.

“How do you know…? Little brother…? How do you..., Madara?”

“How do I know that Madara has no idea? Hashirama, how can you even ask that?”

“I just…”

“You built a village with him. He’s been your friend since childhood. How can you think that Hashirama! What! It’s just one more thing to let go! One more thing to not think about!”

Tobirama was yelling again. Hikaku turned at the sound of approaching feet behind him. Some of the tower’s administrative staff was coming down the hall, no doubt concerned about the shouting. Waving them off, Hikaku indicated that the conversation happening right now in the Hokage’s office was confidential and no one should disturb them.

Hikaku had missed a couple of comments getting rid of the rest of the people on the floor. He tuned back into the conversation to hear, “I might not like Madara. Outside of everything else, we never would have gotten along. He’s too emotional, he jumps to conclusions and doesn’t think things through. He’s volatile, not to mention he’s screechy. I only have room for one person in my life like that and you came first. But despite all of that Madara is fundamentally a decent person. He doesn’t know.”

“Tobirama!” Hikaku could hear as Hashirama tried to lunge up out of his chair, knocking it over just to land with a thump on the ground. “I knew…!”

“SIT. DOWN.” Tobirama interrupted whatever Hashirama was trying to say. “You will sit there and think about what I am saying! You will keep your head out of the clouds and use your brain! Hashirama, think!”

“The first thing Madara did when he became Clan Head was to stop the child hunting teams. The second was to pull back his clan to a more defensive stance. He has hoped since he was a child that the clans could know peace, he just didn’t think it was possible.”

“And your yelling about peace, and love, and your dream on the battlefield, but doing absolutely nothing off the battlefield to show that you were actually willing to work for your dream, didn’t help! How many times did I try to convince you that the first step was a cease-fire? How many times did I tell you that this village of yours wasn’t going to just happen?! That it was going to take work. Hard work and years of effort.”

“But no! You wanted everything right now! No middle steps! And you got it Hashirama! You got what you wanted! But to get what you wanted Madara had to watch his last brother die. His clan had to be so beaten down that they didn’t want to fight anymore.”

“You realize that the Uchiha Clan didn’t choose to join you in the village because they believed so much in your dream, don’t you Hashirama! They choose to join you because they were tired. Tired of all the death and fighting. They fully expected, and probably still expect, it to be a trap. A way to get them just where the Senju want them so that we can try to wipe them out. They’re waiting Anija, waiting for you to strike so that they can say that at least they tried.”

Hikaku didn’t understand what he was hearing. He had always thought Tobirama was against the peace. That he hated the Uchiha. But he had been trying to get Hashirama to do it the sensible way? At this point Hikaku was just trying to keep up.

Hikaku couldn’t hear Hashirama’s response. But he could hear Tobirama.

“I would not be at all surprised if Madara was using his sharigan and saw me strike Izuna, he always paid a lot of attention to Izuna on the battlefield. I would also not be at all surprised if he involuntarily used his sharigan, at least a little, as Izuna was dying. The sharigan responds to emotions. That means that Madara will always have a perfect memory of my killing Izuna and Izuna dying. Nothing will fade it. And you want Madara to be my friend? You want us to work together and be friends? You’re being cruel.”

“This is not your dream world Hashirama. People don’t just get over their trauma because you want them to. We’re not little imaginary people who are here to play the roles that make you happy. We’re real people, with real emotions, and real problems, and that doesn’t just go away because you’re dream says we’re all going to live together as a big happy family!”

“I don’t understand.”

“Hashirama…” 

Hikaku could hear the tired exasperation in the younger Senju’s voice.

“…Hashirama, would you expect Miaka to make friends with Izuna, knowing what he did to her?”

“…”

“He held her for two days. During that time, he used his sharigan to torture her and raped her repeatedly. She was only twelve years old, and she cut off her own hand to escape from the cave he had hidden her in. He almost entirely broke her mind. She left the clan; she couldn’t take the fighting and the knowledge that he might find her again. If I had not made friends with Hitoshi-sama, if he had not offered to take her in, to heal her, she would almost certainly have killed herself. Especially when she learned about the little present, he left her. If Izuna had lived, if he was in the village, would you try to force Miaka to come back. Would you try to convince her to forgive and forget, to make a little happy family with Izuna?”

“No, no, of course not, Tobirama. But, what…”

“Hashirama, you know how much Madara loved Izuna. Simply being in my presence is detrimental to Madara’s mental health. It is its own version of mental torture. You are trying to force Madara to make friends with someone who took something irreplaceable from him. We have not required any of the other Uchiha to make friends with the Senju who killed a family member. And we certainly have not tried to force any of our clan’s people to make friends with specific Uchiha. Personally, I am glad I do not actually know who killed Itama.”

Hikaku at this point had slumped on the floor, leaning against the wall outside the Hokage’s office. This was too much. What he was hearing was too much. He couldn’t understand how Hashirama and Tobirama could say something like that about Izuna. It wasn’t possible. In his distress Hikaku started releasing more chakra in pulses. It was something many shinobi did as an unconscious plea for help when distressed. Especially when family members or allies were close enough to respond.

“I will still…”, Tobirama’s voice trailed off. Two seconds later the door opened and Tobirama Senju was looking down on a dazed Uchiha Hikaku sitting on the floor and staring into nothing. “Fuck!”

Hikaku didn’t really notice as Tobirama turned back and said something to Hashirama who was still in the office. He did, however, notice as Tobirama hauled him to his feet before triggering his thunder god technique. 

As Hikaku staggered in shock over the abrupt relocation, Tobirama dragged him through the house they had found themselves in and into the kitchen. 

***

Dropping Hikaku into one of the chairs next to the kitchen table Tobirama turned to heat the kettle waiting on the stove. The act of making tea was calming, and Hikaku needed something too. But he was definitely glad that built into the very foundation of his home were a series of seals and protections that prevented violence and promoted calm and clear headedness, among others. The abortive spikes of killing intent coming from behind him gave him all the information he needed on how Hikaku wanted to react.

Bringing the tea supplies to the table and making it in front of Hikaku was a little awkward. But as he actually wanted Hikaku to drink the tea, not just look at it, he persevered. 

Taking up his cup Tobirama looked over it at Hikaku on the other side of the table. He had had a chance, now, to think of how he was going to approach the coming conversation.

“It made me wonder who Itama and Kawarama would have grown up to be.”

***

Hikaku stopped glaring as the confusion set in, “what?” What in the Sage’s name was that Senju saying now?

“I knew Izuna from across the battlefield and through rumors. I knew him as Madara’s little brother. Madara, who Hashirama loves. But I never would have thought that of him. I always knew that he hated us, it was obvious. But I just thought that it was the normal hatred between the clans, nothing personal, just pain and grief given a target.”

“What are you talking about Senju!”

“She was only twelve and she wasn’t a combat specialist, she was a runner. She was supposed to be on a 4-day trading run with her team, we didn’t even know she was missing, yet. Then suddenly, one of our border patrols finds her staggering through the trees, missing a hand and naked.”

Hikaku stared across the table at the Senju as he looked down into his tea. He’s seen enough, he can almost picture it in his head, although he sees an Uchiha girl.

“It was obvious what had happened to her. We tried not to push, but at the same time…” the Senju looked back up again. “When we followed the trail back, we found the cave. It had a little torture area and bedroll set up, with Miaka’s hand still there. And in one of the side chambers farther back in the hill we found Hitomi and Aina. Hitomi had been missing for almost 2 months by that point, but she looked like she’d been dead for only a couple of days. Aina was harder to identify, she’d been dead for a long time, but she’d been missing for almost 7 months. We think,” here Tobirama looked out the window into the distance, “we think she’d probably died about the time Hitomi was taken. Hitomi was 13, Aina was 12; he obviously had a preferred age.”

“Senju…,” Hikaku didn’t know what he was supposed to say. 

“There were 2 more bodies eventually found in that cave. They had been buried and were mostly bone by that point and we weren’t able to identify them, not conclusively. We think one of them was Toboe, she was 10 when she disappeared. She wasn’t a shinobi at all, just a Senju. But she disappeared about a year and a half before we found Miaka. The last one couldn’t have been a Senju, we don’t have any more little girls, who are missing.”

“Senju…, I’m sorry for what happened to your family. But I still don’t see why you think it was Izuna. He wouldn’t do something like that!”

“We knew it was an Uchiha.” Here Tobirama shook his head and flicked his hand as if discarding something. “At least we knew that it was either an Uchiha, someone obsessed with the Uchiha or someone trying to frame an Uchiha.”

“What?” Hikaku hissed. He didn’t like what the Senju was saying. The Uchiha didn’t do things like this!

Tobirama leaned back and poured himself another cup of tea as he looked across at Hikaku, “Hitomi had had the Uchiwa branded onto her right around the time she died. And there were marks on what was left of Aina that made it look like the same had been done to her. Mikuro wanted to go set fire to the Uchiha complex and ‘burn the rats out’, as he put it. But the whole thing was so strange, so horrifying. If the Uchiha had started targeting our children again, and in such a disgusting manner, why was everything out there in this cave in the middle of the forest. Who would do something like this? Why?”

“Eventually Miaka identified him. He had told her his name. Wanted her to call him Izuna-sama.”

“Well, she got it wrong! Izuna wouldn’t do something like that! No Uchiha would. Whoever it was, it wasn’t one of us!”

“He used his Mangekyo on her, repeatedly. Correct me if I’m wrong, but the Mangekyo pattern is distinct to the individual.”

Hikaku jerked back, he didn’t know what to answer to that. The Mangekyo was very individual. There were a few times, over the generations, that patterns overlapped, usually in family lines. But the number of Uchiha who even activated the Mangekyo was small, and there were no other people in the clan right now with the same pattern as Izuna had had.

“I don’t know if you were there, but you might remember the fight about two months before the one where I struck Izuna. It was the time I tried to electrocute him using an oversized water dragon? Both clans had to retreat because so much of the area was sparking?”

Hikaku nodded, he remembered hearing about that. He hadn’t been there that day, but the fighters had been talking about it for days. Something had set Tobirama off. They had never seen such widescale destruction from him before. Izuna had stomped around the clan compound for days afterward, enraged.

“It was only a few days since Miaka had been found. We were watching the cave to see who would come back there. But by that point Miaka had already recovered enough that she was able to tell us what she knew.”

“When I confronted Izuna on the battlefield we spoke. I told him we had found his little cave of horrors. I called him a monster, and he told me Miaka had been the best one yet. He knew her name.”

“What?” Hikaku whispered.

“He said we wouldn’t be able to hide her from him and that he was getting so much better at training them up right. That if Hitomi hadn’t defiled the Uchiha bloodline and gotten pregnant he could have kept her for another couple of months. It was then that I lost my temper.”

Hikaku could just stare across the table in horror at the Senju.

“I had tried to kill him before. We were at war, that’s what you do. But until that point it had never been personal. I’ve never hated any of the Uchiha until then. I just acknowledged that the Uchiha were an enemy clan, and the Uchiha, as a whole, are a very strong and dangerous clan, as such a dead Uchiha was safety for the Senju. But it was never personal. I targeted Izuna on the battlefield because he outmatched most of the other fighters in my clan, and to leave him to them would be to have some of them die, not because I had any sort of grudge against him.”

“Hearing him call Miaka a ‘little Senju bitch’. Hearing him admit that he was the one. That’s when Izuna’s death became a priority.”

Hikaku’s face drained of its remaining color. He recognized that phrase. He couldn’t count how many times he’d heard Izuna call Senju Touka a ‘little Senju bitch’. He used that phrase to describe any of the Senju females he was talking about.

At this point Hikaku reached for his, now cold, cup of tea and drained it. He watched Tobirama reach out and pour him another cup, looking up, “that’s still not proof! How do I know you’re not making this up? Trying to justify killing Izuna?”

Tobirama stared steadily back, “I don’t have to justify killing Izuna. We were at war. Are you going to tell me that you have a justification for killing Kinka and Diasuke?”

“Who?”

Tobirama’s face looked even more carved from stone, “you do realize that you have killed Senju during the war, yes? And you realize that they had names and families? Just because you didn’t know their names, just because they weren’t well-known like I am or Izuna was, doesn’t mean that their lives were worth less. Why would I need to justify killing someone during a time when our clans were at war, but you don’t?”

“You killed more than just Izuna!”

“Yes.”

“You killed more Uchiha than any other member of your clan!”

“That is likely, yes.”

“You’re a monster!”

“We are all monsters, Uchiha. We fight and kill for money and pride and stubborn arrogance. The war was pointless. We don’t even know what started it, it was so long ago. The only thing that kept it going was revenge and hatred and spite, on both sides.” 

“If either one of our clans had ever been more concerned with preserving the lives of their own people, rather than continuing this conflict, peace would have been achieved generations ago. It was always possible, even without the agreement of the other clan. The Senju have usually numbered less than 300. The Uchiha, a little more. Do you know how easy it would have been for any of our previous clan heads to simply pack up and leave?”

Hikaku gaped, “w-what?”

“If the Senju had packed up and left. Just left, and disappeared into the distance; would the Uchiha have followed them, just to continue the war?”

“…”

“No, of course not. But doing that would have been a retreat. It would have been a defeat,” Tobirama’s disgust was evident. “We couldn’t possibly just admit defeat and leave the area! That’s our clan land! We can’t leave it! Never mind the fact that we just did!”

Hikaku exploded, “what are you talking about! What does that have to do with anything!”

“We’re all monsters, Uchiha. Every single one of us that perpetuated that stupid, pointless war. You, me, Hashirama, Madara, we’re all monsters.”

“B-but,” Hikaku stuttered, “but what does this have to do with Izuna!” he wailed.

“Nothing, you’re the one that called me a monster, Uchiha. You’re the one that accused me of making up stories to justify Izuna’s death. As if his death, was in some way, more important or more monstrous than any other death during the war.”

Hikaku didn’t know what to say to that. He wanted to say that it was. He had loved Izuna. And, so had Madara. Izuna’s death had left a hole in Madara’s world that just seemed to be growing. His death had been very important. But…, he couldn’t say that it was more important than Kouga’s or Haruto’s or any of the other Uchiha that had died. They had been his cousins too, they had children that would never know them. Hikaku slumped in his seat, hand clutching his cold teacup.


	2. So What Does That Mean?

“So, what now?”

“Nothing.”

“What?” Hikaku watched as Tobirama started to gather up the tea makings. “What do you mean nothing? What am I supposed to do with this?”

“Nothing. You will do nothing. Brother will announce that I have been assigned to the Daimyo’s court. I will be a combination guard and representative of Konoha. You will stay here with the rest of the Uchiha. And hopefully my being gone will help Madara’s mental health and he will stabilize.”

“You’re _leaving_!”

Tobirama turned from where he had been standing at the sink at Hikaku’s shocked question. “That is what the conversation I was having with Hashirama was about. I thought you heard us.”

“You were talking about Madara. How seeing you around the village and being expected to work with you was cruel.”

“Ah. Yes, you just missed it then. Hashirama was trying to convince me to stay.”

Hikaku looked at him, where the Senju was leaning against the counter, arms crossed. He couldn’t tell what the white bastard was thinking, “do you want to go?”

“It is no hardship.”

“But, _why_?”

“I told you why.”

“No, you told me why you don’t have to feel bad or justify Izuna’s death if you don’t want to.”

Tobirama sighed heavily, “in my opinion Madara is well on his way to cracking mentally.” Seeing Hikaku’s indignant face he put up a hand, “you do not have to agree with me. But it _is_ my belief and as such I must act on it.”

Hikaku nodded begrudgingly as he leaned back in his chair and also crossed his arms.

“I do not think Madara is too far gone, yet, and I would like to keep him from getting there. One of the main stressors, I have noticed, is any sort of interaction or reference to myself. I am hoping, that by removing myself from the equation, reducing contact, that Madara can begin to deal with his grief and heal.”

“So, you’re leaving for _Madara_?” Hikaku was incredulous. He didn’t believe that Senju Tobirama would ever go out of his way to help any Uchiha, particularly Madara.

“Peripherally.”

“Peripherally! But you just said…!”

“If Madara goes mad, who will end up having to deal with him?”

Hikaku gaped. He couldn’t even imagine. I mean, sure, Madara had been more erratic lately, but he wasn’t going to go _mad_.

“If Madara goes mad, my brother will have to deal with him. Hashirama loves Madara, if Madara goes mad Hashirama is one of the few in the village that will even stand a chance of subduing him. However, considering Madara’s strength it would, more than likely, be a true fight to the death. I would prefer that not to happen. And that doesn’t even touch on the absolute disaster it would be for Hashirama and Madara to fight. It would tear the village apart. But that’s all I can see for the future if things continue on as they are. Which is why you are not going to tell Madara anything about the conversation that we’ve just had. He doesn’t need to know.”

Hikaku looked at the Senju in front of him. Tobirama was always serious, but his face had a particularly grim cast to it right now. “You really believe that, don’t you?”

Tobirama ignored the question, “I have been acquainted with the Daimyo for years. Living there will not be a hardship for me, in fact I already have a residence just outside the capital. It should only take me two more days to finalize all the details and finish packing my belongings.”

“You’re really leaving.”

“Yes. Most of my work will have to be taken up by other people. But I will send letters regularly. I will still be involved in village infrastructure and planning, anything that isn’t time sensitive or requires my presence. I will have access to the Daimyo’s library and will be able to continue my research and experiments. The results will be sent to the village for its use. It is unlikely that I will be in the village often, but my residence will be available to any Konoha shinobi that finds themselves in the capitol. I am not _disappearing_ , Uchiha. I will simply not be _here_.”

-

Hikaku dazedly walked through the forming village on the way to the compound the Uchiha had built. Walking through the tori gates the elders had insisted on, he made his way past Elder Kaede’s house and was just turning down the street leading to his house when his name was called. Madara landed on the street in front of him, hair spiked out and flying.

“What happened? Are you okay? I felt you at the tower, but when I got there Hashirama told me the bastard had taken you to talk and left.”

Hikaku just looked at Madara, “Tobirama is leaving.”

“What, he’s going on a mission? Where’s Hashirama sending him now?”

“No, I mean he’s _leaving_. Moving out. Not going to live here anymore.”

“ _What_? Where’s he going?”

“He convinced Hashirama to assign him to a post in the capital. He’ll be gone in two days.”

“ _He_ convinced Hashirama? So this isn’t some sort of punishment, or something?” Madara looked incredulous, “I didn’t think I’d ever see the day that _Tobirama_ left Hashirama’s side.” A sour look came over his face before he sneered, “hmpf, just can’t stand the village, can he. Can’t stand all the Uchiha around.”

Hikaku looked at Madara and wondered if he should share what he had learned this afternoon. He didn’t believe for a second that Izuna was the monster the younger Senju brother had made him out to be, but he could grudgingly admit that the Senju seemed to believe it. In the end, he decided to keep that part of the conversation to himself and just share the part that impacted Madara directly.

“He says he’s leaving because of you…”

“Me!” Madara interrupted, before a dark smirk crossed his lips, “can’t stand to look at me, huh?”

“…” Hikaku watched Madara. Changing his mind, he left it at that. It was stupid; the _Senju_ was stupid. And there was no reason to think he’d been honest anyways. Saying goodnight to his clan head he turned and finished his journey to his home.

-

Hashirama moped around the office for the first week after Tobirama had left before he took a deep breath and stood up. Walking down the hallway to the office that had formerly been shared between his brother and his best friend he thought of Tobirama’s words to him. He really should listen to his brother more often. It didn’t seem like it, with Hashirama’s loud and colorful personality compared to Tobirama’s quiet dignity, but Tobirama really was the better of the two at understanding people. Tobirama had told him once it was because he was too busy seeing who he wanted people to be in the future, instead of who they _are_ , right now. People liked Hashirama better, but it was always Tobirama who noticed when there was something wrong, when someone was in pain. That’s why children flocked to him so easily.

Sighing heavily, he looked around the bare room, everything of Tobirama’s having been removed and Madara not having much in the way of possessions. Hashirama sighed as he ran his fingers along the empty desk he had made for his brother, thinking about everything Tobirama had been trying so hard to get him to understand. He wondered if his insistence on Madara and Tobirama sharing an office had just made everything worse. Giving Madara a sad look as the Uchiha looked back in question, Hashirama knew that he had to do this, “Hey, Mads. I need to talk to you. Have lunch with me later?”

Getting the Uchiha’s agreement, Hashirama dragged himself back to his office. There was no more adorable little brother to get in a snit whenever he skipped out on his paperwork anymore. No more Tobirama to give him that disappointed look and then take half of the paperwork for himself just so that everything got finished on time. Sitting at the desk he started going through the stack he had left on top, dreading the time that Madara came and got him for lunch, but _‘it has to be done.’_

-

“Hashirama? Are you ready?” Madara knocked on the door to Hashirama’s office.

“Yeah, just let me finish this.” Hashirama finished reading the paper in front of him and signed the bottom, before looking up.

The two left the building side by side, although Madara was surprised when they didn’t head for the food stalls in the main business district. Hashirama loved sitting outside at the stalls and watching the village move around him. Instead the two headed into the village proper and Madara realized shortly that they were headed for the house Hashirama shared with his wife Mito.

Entering the house to find it empty, Hashirama went straight to the kitchen and started putting together an obviously pre-made meal. Sitting down at the table, Madara watched Hashirama fiddle unnecessarily as he avoided eye contact and kept all his attention on the food in front of him. “So, what’s this all about?”

Drooping in depression, Hashirama finally brought the food to the table, setting it down. Sitting, he took a deep breath, looked Madara in the eye, and said, “I owe you an apology.”

Looking back blankly, not knowing what this was all about, Madara could only reply, “for what?”

Hashirama burst into noisy tears, “oh, Mads, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to be so mean to you! I’m a terrible friend!” he wailed.

“What the hell, blasted Senju! What are you talking about!”

That’s when it all came pouring out. Tobirama trying to get Hashirama to back off ever since the village started to come together. How terrible Hashirama now felt at having pushed so hard for Madara and Tobirama to be friends. That Hashirama was hurting his friend, hurting him every time he pushed Madara to spend time with Tobirama. That Tobirama was finally fed up with it, fed up with Hashirama not listening and had requested the Daimyo to _ask_ for him. Ask specifically for Tobirama to be their representative at court. That that argument Hikaku had heard a couple of days before the younger Senju left, had finally gotten through to Hashirama. That he now understood what Tobirama had been trying so hard to explain.

“I never meant to hurt you that way, you have to believe me, my friend. Tobirama always says I get too stubborn and refuse to listen. I knew that you didn’t like him, but I just so hoped that two of the people I love most in the world would become close. That we could be a family to each other.” Hashirama’s sad face stared up at Madara where he was frozen on the other side of the table. “Can you ever forgive me, Madara?”

Madara stared across the table at his friend. Not saying a word, he got up and left, quietly shutting the door behind him. Going back to the tower he went to the office he used to share with Tobirama and got back to work.

Twenty minutes later he felt Hashirama stop outside his door before he continued down the hall to his own office. Finishing the report he was working on, Madara stopped to look out the window at the growing village. Standing at the window his eyes took in the various clan compounds still under construction. The onsen set to the side where naturally occurring hot springs bubbled up from the earth. The start of a merchant district and general housing. All the parts of a village were coming to life around them.

Turning from the window he took in the bare half of his office. The empty desk that used to house that pale bastard. There were times it had been a struggle not to just go over there and kill him where he sat; seemingly oblivious to Madara and the threat he made. Seemingly oblivious to the pain he caused simply by existing. He needed to talk to Hikaku.

-

The talk with Hikaku hadn’t taken long. The other Uchiha explaining that Tobirama thought if Madara had to interact with the younger Senju for much longer, especially with Hashirama always pushing them together, that Madara would crack, mentally. That Tobirama thought Madara was falling apart and hoped that, with Tobirama gone, he’d get _better_ , be able to _accept_ the death of his last brother.

That was the end of the conversation as it had led to Madara exploding in rage and disappearing to abduct Hashirama so that he could scream at him, hiding his anger behind a sparring session.

_He was **never** going to accept Izuna being gone!_


	3. Time Passes and It Begins

Alternatively: Tobirama Invents Shinobi Texting

It was only a couple of months later that Madara could admit, quietly and to himself, that Tobirama might have had a point. He had noticed that he was less stressed since Tobirama was gone. Less likely to take a comment as a personal attack, either against himself or his clan. Less angry. Less likely to spend his night in front of the shrine he had set up in his house, brooding and talking to Izuna. That last _hurt_ , that he might be starting to get over the death of his brother, that he might someday find that he had let go of Izuna. He didn’t know who he was anymore without that. Being Izuna’s big brother had been one of the pillars of his identity, who would he be without that?

He could still remember with perfect clarity that day. The day his brother lost. But without Tobirama here, without seeing the Senju for hours at a time each day, the memories weren’t constantly there. He wasn’t seeing that horrible vision for hours at a time every day. 

He hated that; that Tobirama had been right. He hated that he was seeing what was around him without a constant overlay. He hated that he was almost relieved.

***

The council of clan heads looked down at the latest series of dispatches from the Fire capital. Lord Asahi had sent several mission requests as well as approval for the clearing of more land as the village grew. Along with the missives from the Daimyo, there was an entire case full of paperwork from Tobirama.

“Does your brother realize that he’s supposed to be our representative to the Daimyo? He doesn’t have to do his old job too.”

Hashirama looked down at the case that was sitting in the middle of the room. The administration staff had just brought it in, but no one had yet been brave enough to see what Tobirama had sent this time. Ever since that first dispatch nine months ago, the monthly cases full of proposals had only grown. It seems that Tobirama was a little bored in the capital and didn’t have enough to occupy his time. No longer having to go over mission reports and deal with the day to day running of the village had given him plenty of time to think about improvements and suggestions for the village.

Someone whispered, “it’s the biggest one so far.

The clan council would _love_ to just be able to disregard everything Tobirama sent. After all, the Senju wasn’t even _in_ the village, how could he possibly know what was needed. Unfortunately, the absent Senju had a positive genius for anticipating problems no one had thought of and coming up with unique solutions. Anticipating problems that hadn’t even happened yet, or might never happen, but that once pointed out the council couldn’t ignore. Either that or there was an unknown spy reporting to him. At least Tobirama never sent problems without solutions; the Senju was good about that, always sending possible solutions along as well. Hashirama had once repeated one of his brother’s favorite sayings, ‘anyone can point out a problem, not everyone can think of a solution,’. The various clan heads had decided that that quote described Tobirama perfectly.

Giving a growl, Madara stomped to the shipping box in the middle of the room. Ripping the lid off he tossed it to the side and reached down to start pulling out neatly labeled folders and boxes. The biggest collection this time was a series of boxes all labeled ‘academy’. “Sage damn Senju, even when he’s gone, he’s still here!”

The worst part, in Madara’s opinion, was that without the Senju there to remind everyone of his terrible personality, the thorough planning and detailed explanations included in every proposal meant that the majority of them were accepted. The pale bastard wasn’t here, and he was _still_ shaping the village to his liking. It was _infuriating_! It was infuriating because _Madara_ agreed with his vision!

Almost all the safeguards being put in place to prevent corruption of power had been proposed by Tobirama. The extensive tax law, different for civilians and shinobi, had largely been outlined by Tobirama. The formation of the hospital and most of the public works had been suggestions from Tobirama! Hell, he’d even designed an earth jutsus that created perfect maintenance tunnels for the sewer and water lines being run, having convinced the council to do that from the beginning for the entire village, instead of leaving it to the expense of the individual. And, of course, every proposal had come with contingencies and answers to every possible question or argument. Answers to questions people didn’t even know to ask! Damn that Senju Tobirama!

Buried under all the packing and paperwork, Madara found the reason for the oversized box this time. Reaching in, he pulled out the first of two boxes and set it on the table in front of everyone. Pulling the note that had been tied to it off, he read it, before turning and looking in surprise at the box. Made of cherry wood it was surprisingly beautiful. Inlaid with a stylized depiction of Konoha’s leaf, it was the length of his forearm and as wide and deep as his spread hand.

“Huh.” Handing the note to Hashirama he reached in and pulled out the second box. It was the reverse of the other, being made of black walnut, with the inset leaf made of cherry.

“Oh! He finally got them to work!” Hashirama fluttered over to the two boxes, handing the note to the Nara clan head. Shikari read the note before looking with interest at the boxes and handing it along. By this time, Hashirama had eagerly pulled the top page off the stack of proposals Tobirama had sent them, scribbled a quick note on the back and stuffed it into the cherry wood box. A burst of chakra and pulling up the lid of the box had him beaming and bouncing around the room exclaiming to all and sundry how genius his adorable little brother was.

Madara tried to ignore his friend’s antics as he looked down into the cherry box noting it emptiness. The rest of the clan heads had, by this time, all had a chance to read the note, and also came to take a look at the now empty box. Speculation on the usefulness of Tobirama’s latest innovation was still taking place when ten minutes later there was a burst of chakra from the walnut box.

Opening the box in excitement, Hashirama pulled out the paper only to suddenly droop and whine. “Little brother is so mean, sometimes.” Taking the second page that had been in the box, Hashirama straightened it out and put it back on the stack he had originally gotten it from.

Snagging the note Madara saw that all the younger Senju had written was an admonishment to Hashirama to put the proposal back the way it was supposed to be and to do his work.

The council session ended soon after. Tobirama’s proposals being spread out to the various people and groups who were working on the problems. The boxes ended up set up in Tobirama’s old workspace. It being one of the few secured places in the tower that had the room, Madara never having spread out very far from his original contained work area. Unfortunately this meant that Madara had to get used to people coming in to his office; the boxes having been set up on Tobirama’s old desk with a stack of paper and pencils ready.

Over the next couple of months, Madara got used to working with Tobirama on various problems. It got to the point that he almost forgot that the person on the other side of the box was Tobirama, not having to look at or hear the Senju. Conversation between them flowed fast and constant, bouncing from village gossip to work to Hashirama’s latest debacle. The two of them worked smoothly together, even the necessary wait time as comments and responses were passed back and forth were barely noticed. It was easy to forget; to not pay attention to just who was on the other side of the carved boxes.


	4. It's Been a Year Now

The year was coming to a close and Hashirama and Madara were in the Hokage’s office. “Do you think Shibaku would mind giving our report to the Daimyo, or do you think we should ask Choujirou?”

“What?” Madara looked up from his sake. He’d been trying to relax with his friend without the witch around, what was he talking about now?

“Well, it’s been almost a year since Tobira left for the capital. I know he keeps the Daimyo informed, but we still need to send someone to make an official report on the village. I was wondering if we should ask Shibaku or Choujirou. Choujirou would probably do a better job, but Shibaku is from a noble clan as well and I don’t want him to feel slighted.”

“ _I’m_ from a noble clan! Why the hell would you ask one of those two!”

Hashirama gaped at Madara who was looking at him like he thought the Senju’s brain had finally turned to wood. “B-but, Mads….”

“What the hell, Hashi? I’ve given the report the last three times! Ever since we started the damn village!”

“B-but Mads.”

“But what, Hashirama!”

“You’d have to stay with Tobirama,” Hashirama replied softly. Ever since a year ago, when Hashirama had apologized to Madara, the Senju had tried to keep references to his brother to a minimum when Madara was around. It was hard, but he had tried to not bring Tobirama up unless it concerned the village.

Madara abruptly went silent. That hadn’t even occurred to him. He looked away; it’d been almost a year since he had seen the pale Senju. The Senju had originally lived in his own house on the outskirts of the capital. But five months before the village had decided to spend a little of its own money and bought a property closer to the Daimyo’s palace for their representative to live in. Tobirama had promptly sold the little house he had bought using his savings, and was apparently using that money to fix up and repair the slightly dilapidated estate owned by Konoha.

If Madara went to give the yearly report to the Daimyo, he would be expected to stay at the estate with Tobirama. Before Tobirama had left the village, they had tried to hide the extent of the rift between the clans; mainly the rift between the Uchiha clan head and the Senju clan heir. He wouldn’t have any excuse to stay anywhere else, he wouldn’t have a choice.

“Shibaku can go.” With that statement, Madara didn’t really feel like socializing anymore and left.

-

Making his way home Madara ignored his name being called and walked into his house. Putting his shoes away he made his way to his shrine. Lighting the incense, Madara sat down and thought about the last year.

He hated to admit it, but the Senju had probably been right. It had taken a couple weeks for him to calm down, but he had finally gotten the full conversation from Hikaku. Tobirama’s fear that Madara was cracking, that Hashirama, as the only one strong enough in the village to stop him would have to kill him, and the way the Uchiha clan and all the other clans would react to the new Hokage killing a clan head. It would destroy the village.

If you’d asked him a year ago, he wouldn’t necessarily have thought that was a bad thing. But this last year had…, not been good, but it _had_ … been better. Not being forced to interact with Tobirama had finally let the bleeding wound of Izuna’s death scab over. It wasn’t healed, but….

Looking up at the shrine Madara thought about Izuna. Thought about how much Izuna would have hated the village, it had never been something he wanted. More than just distrust of the Senju; Izuna had never _wanted_ the village. He’d never understood or believed in Madara’s dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll totally take suggestions for physics-defying Justus for Tobirama to work on in his boredom. I don't know how many I'll use, but I'll take anyone's ideas!


	5. My Self-indulgent Fixing of Canon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This work is unfinished and there's no guarantee how fast the chapters will come out once I get to the end of what I've already written.
> 
> Happy Holidays, everyone!

My Self-indulgent Fixing of Canon: After All, What Else is Fanfiction Good For

***

The end of the year passed peacefully. Work continued, shinobi were sent out on missions, more of the minor clans were negotiating to join the village, building continued, and the Hyuga had finally responded to a message and were sending a delegation. 

Madara looked up at the commotion he heard coming from down the hallway. Hashirama was being louder than usual. Getting up he made his way to the hallway only to stop at the loud exclamation of “Tobirama! Oh, I’ve missed you so much!”

Stopping short, Madara took a deep breath before stepping to his doorway and looking down the hall. Hashirama had plastered himself against Senju Tobirama and the two of them were leaning back against a wall. Hashirama was laughing and crying all at once as he hugged his brother, his billowing sleeves all but hiding the younger man.

As the two Senju disappeared into the Hokage’s office, Madara caught a quick flash of red eyes glancing at him before the door shut.

Going back to his work, Madara wasn’t able to concentrate well and so ended up staying late to finish his work. Entering his home, he walked up to his shrine and fingered the bamboo in front of it. It had been a year and a half since he had seen Izuna’s killer. No doubt he was in the village for a reason and he would hear about it in the morning. Taking a deep breath, Madara didn’t know what to think or feel.

The burning pain and anguish he had felt at the death of Izuna had largely faded although it would spike sometimes, and he would always miss him. But this would be the first time he would see Tobirama since the man had left, he didn’t know how he would react. Would all that rage and hatred come back? Or had it faded too? Many times, he barely paid attention to who he was corresponding with on the other side of the transport box. Would that carry over? He didn’t know.

Entering the council chamber Madara took in Hashirama and Tobirama who were already present. Tobirama was writing on some papers in front of him, Hashirama leaning against his side, hand around Tobirama’s other wrist, just holding on. Madara had to look away as he went and sat down at his seat. He knew Hashirama had missed his brother, that not being able to see him for all this time had been hard. Letters had gone back and forth regularly, especially after Tobirama had sent his transport boxes, but…

Hashirama hadn’t said anything when Madara was around. He knew that he was trying to be more sensitive; Tobirama’s forced departure having finally gotten through to the Senju. But Madara still knew that sometimes his friend felt like there was a hole in his life. A hole that could be filled at any time, if only Tobirama would come home.

The rest of the council filed in and sat in their seats. The Inuzuka clan head taking the time they were waiting to complain about the excessive number of proposals, all with corresponding research and references accompanying each recommendation. The Inuzuka along with the Yamanaka and Nara had been put in charge of the formation of the village academy and civilian school system, something that Tobirama is _very_ interested in. If he had still been in the village, no doubt Tobirama would have taken over that project himself. Consequently, they had more letters and notes than anyone else on the council; except possibly for Madara who had constant access to the boxes.

The council session started and Madara finally found out why Tobirama had made the journey to Konoha from the capital.

“But we can’t interfere with internal clan politics, Tobirama! If we hadn’t of agreed to that no one would have joined!”

“I am not suggesting that we interfere. We are not forcing the Hyuga to join Konoha. If they choose to stay apart from the village, that is their choice.”

Hatake Kuniaki asked, “I don’t understand why you have such a problem with the seal they use. It was explained to me, once, that it was simply to prevent anyone from stealing their eyes.”

Tobirama looked over at the Hatake clan head, “I assume it was someone in the Hyuga main family that told you that. Not very much information is known about the branch seal, after all.”

At the Hatake’s confirmation, Tobirama continued, “Sealing the Hyuga doujutsu is the primary purpose of the seal, however it is not the only purpose. I had the opportunity to examine a branch member’s seal and the way it destroys the eyes is by destroying the structure of the optic nerve. Without that, the eye is useless. This destruction of the nerves happens automatically with the death of the Hyuga branch member.”

Seeing the understanding on the faces of all the present clan heads, he kept talking, his first statement was shocking, it didn’t get better. “Death is not the only way to trigger the seal and destroy the optic nerve. A specific jutsu, taught to all the main house members, will also cause the seal to activate. The justification for this, is that the main house must have the ability to deny their doujutsu to people who are attempting to capture, yet not kill, Hyuga members.”

The room fell silent before Hashirama broke it to exclaim, “well, there you go, Tobi, they’re just trying to protect themselves.”

Tobirama sent his brother a quelling glare. “If the Hyuga were truly so worried about the possibility of their eyes being stolen, then every single member would have the seal placed upon them and every single member would be taught the activation jutsu. The seal, when activated does not just destroy the optic nerve. The damage is centered upon the optic nerve, but it attacks and destroys everything surrounding it as well. The pain from such a seal would be excruciating and would result in death if activated for too long. It is a slavery seal, brother. It is placed upon branch house members when they are children, and any rebellion in the family is swiftly and painfully dealt with.” Tobirama waited until Hashirama opened his mouth to finish, “permanently.”

Tobirama’s statement caused the clan heads around the table to sit back, shocked. The Nara looked thoughtful, with the Inuzuka turning to the Aburame next to him.

“You don’t know that, brother! I’m sure the Hyuga clan head wouldn’t do anything like that!”

Tobirama leaned back and crossed his arms as he looked at Hashirama. The rest of the clan heads fell silent. “How many people are in the Hyuga clan, do you know, Hashirama.”

“Uh, maybe…, two hundred, two hundred fifty, I don’t know Tobirama! Clans don’t really advertise that type of information!”

“Three hundred sixty-seven. They’re one of the larger clans. Of those, fifty-four are considered main family and so have the lives of the rest of the clansmen in the palm of their hands.” Tobirama looked intently at Hashirama, “do you believe, Hashirama, that every single one of those fifty-four people, whom you have not met, are good people who would never _dream_ of hurting anyone _just because they can_! That’s the problem with a slavery seal, the victim can never escape! Not unless they find a seal master with both the knowledge and willingness to remove the seal. Do you think that any of those branch house members will _ever_ tell anyone what happens behind closed doors? What happens to a woman, or a child, that angers one of the main house? What happens to a woman that _does not want_ to have sex with someone in the main house? You think they are allowed to say ‘no’?”

“Tobi!”

Tobirama’s face is forbidding as he stares down his brother in the middle of the council meeting. “There are people in the Senju I would not trust with such a power. _O_ _ur_ clan. I would _never_ want some of our members, some of our elders having that kind of power over the children of our clan. And that is _our_ clan, Anija!” Tobirama’s eyes swept the rest of the council. “I am _sure_ if these honorable clans head _really think about it_ , they could think of someone in their _own_ clans who should never be given that kind of power over anyone, let alone a child in their own clans.”

“B-but, but we can’t interfere, Tobirama!”

“Then _don’t_. But also, don’t accept them within the village. Not with that damn seal. The whole reason for this village is so that children can be children. I know you want to unite all the clans of Fire, Anija, but there are some things that shouldn’t be compromised on. Once they are a part of the village, there’s no going back. No fixing it later. Any agreements made now; we’ll have to live with. Can you live with this?” Tobirama looked at the rest of the men in the room. “Can you live with an agreement that a Hyuga elder can punish a child for spilling tea on his robes by torturing that child in front of you. To literally damage that child’s brain, and _you will be allowed to do **nothing**?_ Can you live with that in this village?”

“That’s very specific, Tobirama.” Madara broke in before Hashirama or any of the others could react to that outrageous statement.

“Hn.”

Madara kept his eyes on the younger Senju brother in front of him, “when you were at the capital was there a Hyuga delegation present Shibaku?”

The Aburame seated next to Inuzuka Kouga inclined his head towards Madara, “a reasonable assumption, yet not true.” Pausing long enough for everyone to think he was finished speaking he continued, “why: because the Hyuga party was expected to arrive a month after my departure.”

Inuzuka Kouga surged to his feet aggressively, his canine companion, Kiba followed with a low growl. “What the hell, Senju! Are you saying you watched a pup tortured and did _nothing_?”

Tobirama looked away, not answering.

“Tobi?” Hashirama’s quiet voice broke through the yelling and questions several of the clan heads had all broken out in.

“I do not want that seal in this village, Hashirama.”

“I’m sure once they feel safe, they’ll stop using it, Tobirama. We won’t have any influence at all, if they don’t join the village.”

“I agree with Tobirama,” Madara’s deep voice cut Hashirama off. Most of the room turned to gawk at the Uchiha. “What!”

“You…, agree… with Tobirama?” questioned Akimichi Choujiro.

Madara folded his arms and slumped in his chair before he growled out, “yes! I agree with Tobirama. If they get added to the village with the seal, they’ll never have a reason to stop using it. People who have power over others don’t like to give it up if they don’t have to. It’ll be ‘clan tradition,’ and untouchable.”

Hatake Kuniaki spoke, “but what if they don’t join?”

“Then they don’t join.” The surprising answer came from the Yamanaka. Yamanaka Inori looked around the room, “not every clan in Fire is going to choose to join us. It would be a shame if the Hyuga don’t, but there are some things that I don’t want in the village. I agree with Tobirama-san, I do not think I could stand back and watch someone torture a child just because they can. True, clan pride would probably prevent them from _actually_ doing it in front of any of us, but knowing it’s going on…, just behind closed doors? That doesn’t make it better. I agree with Uchiha-sama, those who have power over another rarely give that up without reason.”

“Troublesome,” Nara Shikari looked over at Tobirama, “you always bring the troublesome problems to us.” Ignoring Tobirama’s insulted look he turned to the rest there, “the smaller clans are asking to join because clients are coming here. The mixed teams are surviving better, and Wind and Earth both have rumors of possible villages forming. If the Hyuga don’t join now, they’ll do it later. I agree with Tobirama, no seal, we can wait.”

Debate went on for a while longer, but in the end Hashirama had to agree with the majority of the clan heads that he really didn’t want a seal like that being used on people in his village. The elder Senju really believed that the Hyuga would eventually feel safe in the village and stop using the seal, but the combined resistance from the majority of the council convinced him to make it a condition of admittance to the village for the Hyuga.


	6. Breakthrough And Meeting Elder Kaede

Breakthrough and Meeting Elder Kaede

It was two days later that Madara first encountered Tobirama without anyone else present. They met on the outskirts of the village by the edge of one of the training grounds. Madara stopped and watched as Tobirama finished training on one of the grounds next to the river. Seeing that the Senju was winding down, Madara stepped out into the open, although he didn’t approach.

Tobirama finished his workout before turning to Madara, “Uchiha.”

“Senju”

“Did you need something?”

“…”

At hearing no answer Tobirama dismissed Madara and started to walk back into the village. 

“…You were right!” Madara called after the retreating back. The Senju stopped but didn’t turn back, which Madara was thankful for. He didn’t think he could say this to Tobirama’s face. “You were right, it was too much, seeing you every day.”

Tobirama’s head turned to the side, but he was still faced away, “is it better? With me gone, is it better?”

“…Yes.”

“Hn.” Tobirama started to walk again, “I’ll be gone in three days, Uchiha.” With that, the Senju took a step and was gone. Madara wasn’t able to follow his movements, not having had his sharigan activated. Although he did think the Senju had gotten even faster in the year and a half that he’d been gone. 

Tobirama was as good as his word and had left for the capital three days later. Madara didn’t know _why_ he was feeling so restless after the Senju’s departure. But the resumption of his correspondence with Tobirama through the messaging box a few days later had him asking the question he hadn’t realized had been nagging at him.

‘How did you know?’

‘Know what?’

‘How did you know that it was too much? How did you know that it was seeing you? I thought it was the village, the way the clan split, and we had to join the village, how did you know? No one else noticed, why did you?’

‘You’re not the only one that has been traumatized.’

‘You?’

‘No, at least, not like that. Not any more than anyone else who does what we do. But you’re not so different from others that I’ve seen.’

It took several days for Madara to respond to that one, ‘Does it get better?’

‘Do you want it to get better?’

It took even longer for Madara to respond to that one. ‘I don’t know.’

This time it took several hours before Tobirama replied. ‘I have found that most pain fades over time. Loss is a part of life and as you continue to live the loss moves from being everything you think about, to being just another part of you. You can refuse to go on, keep that pain fresh and a part of you forever, but you will stop living if you do. I do not know if Izuna would want that for you. I did not have a good opinion of him. But I do know that Itama and Kawarama would not have wanted that for me. I will never not miss them, wonder who they would have been if they had been allowed to grow up. But I will not stop living for them.’

‘Why are you the only one who noticed?’ that was the question Madara really wanted answered. Hashirama hadn’t noticed, in fact, he had made it worse. No one in his clan had said anything, they’d just been cautious around him, tried not to anger him too much.

‘How do you know I’m the only one who noticed? Maybe I was just the first one to act. Maybe others noticed and they just didn’t know what to do to help.’

That made Madara stop and think, _‘maybe they didn’t know what to do, how to help.’_ Leaving the tower after he finished reading the reports he needed to go through, Madara made his way towards the Uchiha compound.

Stopping in to visit with Elder Kaede he sipped the tea she set in front of him. Kaede knew everything that was going on in the compound. And considering her house, placed at the entrance of the compound with a good view into this section of the village, she knew a lot of what was going on in the village as well.

Despite being an irreverent gossip, Kaede was a shrewd woman who understood people, especially her clan’s people, well. As such she waited patiently as Madara gathered his thoughts.

“Did you know?”

“Know what? Be specific, boy.”

“Tobirama left the village because of me. He thought I was mad, or at least, heading that direction. He noticed that just seeing him made it worse and he didn’t want Hashirama to end up having to kill me, so he left.”

Kaede just looked at Madara, not saying anything.

Madara hmpfed and looked away in embarrassed aggravation, he hated this. “He was right. Did you know?”

Elder Kaede set down her cup in front of her and watched Madara try to hide his face from her. “Uchiha love with all their hearts, they pour everything they are into their loved ones. Particularly those blessed and cursed to activate our eyes. We never forget, memories don’t fade with us, they can’t.”

“That doesn’t….”

“Don’t interrupt, boy!” Madara’s mouth snapped shut. “When a Uchiha loses too many precious people the memories can drive them mad. Even the best of us can be overcome by the strength of our love turned to despair. You asked if I knew, of course I knew, boy! But there is nothing anyone else can do. It is a testament to your love of your brother. Now it is up to you, are you going to find someone else to love, someone else to pour all you are into? The memories never fade, the only thing to do is to make new, just as important memories; that is the only way an Uchiha heals. Those that simply let go turn into husks of their former selves. All-in-all, it is not the ones that go mad that are to be pitied, I’ll leave that to the ones that turn into the walking dead.”

“So I really was going mad?”

Kaede picked up her cup again, “I can’t answer that. Were you?”

“….” Madara took a sip of his tea. _‘Yes’_. He had a feeling elder Kaede heard his answer even though he didn’t say it aloud. _‘There are still days when it feels like I’m going mad.’_

“What will you do now?”

Madara didn’t have an answer to that and the conversation died. A few minutes later, having said the polite goodbyes expected of him by the elder, Madara was leaving the house.

“I have a question for you now, boy.”

Madara paused, turning back to look at the elderly Uchiha woman. “Only those who can find someone else precious, those who find love again, are able to live and come back from the madness. Oh, you can coast for a while, as the loss settles. But to truly come back and live, that requires love. So who have you found, boy? Who have you sparked with? It's not true, yet, I can tell. But who are you looking at?”

Madara didn’t even have a chance to answer before he had a door shut in his face. Left there, sputtering on the engawa wrapping around the house, Madara turned and stomped down the steps. _‘Damn meddling woman! What does she know? There's no spark!’_ There wasn’t anyone Madara had _feelings_ for. At most it was probably the friendship with Hashirama and the effort it took to build the village; make it something better than his childhood dreams.

_‘Tobirama will be interested in what Kaede had to say.’_ Madara didn’t even realize that the thought had crossed his mind as he walked toward his house.


	7. A Lot of Time Passes and Madara Still Doesn’t Have a Clue

A Lot of Time Passes and Madara Still Doesn’t Have a Clue, But At Least the Time Line Is Explained

***

‘Your brother is driving me crazy.’

‘What’s he done now?’

‘First he wanted a festival to celebrate both the peace between the Uchiha and Senju and the founding of the village. But now, every time the paperwork for the festival that’s in _ten days_ is put on his desk, he disappears. Says he’s busy! And I can do it!’

‘I thought he’d been doing better with his paperwork?’

‘Yeah, without you here to nag we had a few minor crises. He finally seemed to get it.’

‘I do not _nag_.’

‘You’re a total nag. And with all the forms and rules and regulations you’ve created, I think you secretly love bureaucracy.’

‘I love competence and efficiency. Unfortunately, when running a village, that requires paperwork. Sometimes done in triplicate.’

‘You’re evil.’

‘Only mildly.’

Another response came through from Tobirama as Madara tried to get back to his work.

‘I know brother wants you to be seen as the logical successor if anything should happen to him. Do you think he wants you to take charge of the planning and running of this festival in an effort to have the public view you in the same light?’

Madara had never thought of that. ‘Maybe. But it’s still irritating. If that’s what he’s doing why couldn’t he just _say_ so. If it’s not, then that means he’s trying to get me to do his paperwork for him.’

‘True. What are you going to do about it?’

Madara gave an evil grin as he signed off on his revenge, ‘I’ve set it up so that the Hokage is in charge of judging all of the children’s competitions at the same time as the drinking competition and taste testing is going on, on the other side of the village.’

‘I approve. Do you have anything else?’

‘I’m still thinking. Have any suggestions?’

I took a couple of minutes for the reply to come. ‘Did you know that Hashirama _hates_ kabuki. He finds it boring and overly stylized. Father once sent him to guard a famous kabuki actor who had threats made against him, he had to attend every performance for two weeks. He vowed that he would never watch another again.’

‘Perfect. Thanks.’

‘My pleasure.’

That conversation, which took place a year and ten months after Tobirama had left for the capital showed just how relaxed the correspondence between Tobirama and Madara had become. Now, a year later and the same festival was coming around again. Unfortunately for Madara, Hashirama seemed to have learned his lesson and the opportunities to torture his old friend were few and far between.

As he was sitting in his office finishing the security measures for the influx of visitors Madara had a thought. Quickly he sent a message, ‘the founding celebration is happening in two weeks. Are you going to come?’

‘Madara? Did you mean this message to be for me?’

‘Yes, of course.’

‘Thank you for offering, but I don’t think it’s a good idea.’

Madara stood up to go and stand by the window that looked out on the village. It had been almost three years since Tobirama had left for the capital; over four since they began laying down the first building in the village. Six years since Madara had given in to the pressures of his rebelling clan and accepted Hashirama's peace offer. Other than the time he had come to argue the exclusion of the Hyuga as long as they still used their seal, Tobirama had not been back. Hashirama had made a short trip to the capital to see the Daimyo, but that’s it.

He thought of the messages he had shared with Tobirama in the past year. The embarrassing stories he now knew about Hashirama and his first attempts at mokuton and his over the top attempts to woo Mito. The warning he was able to give Kisuke that Touka almost certainly liked only girls. The hours and hours’ worth of research that had obviously been put into making sure the village functioned; both physically with the latest innovations in plumbing and sewage, architecture and defensive layout, as well as administratively, although he cursed him for that sometimes.

Madara thought of how Tobirama had somehow become a friend. When Hashirama did something silly the first thing he thought of was to write and tell Tobirama. When something interesting happened in the village he always shared it with Tobirama. The man’s snark and sarcasm were beautiful when not aimed at him.

It had been almost eight years since Izuna had died. And sometimes, Madara thought it would be nice to be able to see his friend’s face when he complained that Inuzuka Kouga’s companion Kiba should have been put in charge of the Academy, instead of the human in that partnership.

Before he could stop himself, he had sent another message, ‘are you ever going to come home?’

It took almost an hour for the sheet of paper they had been passing back and forth through the message box to come back. Madara could see several dots of ink where, no doubt, Tobirama had tapped his pen, thinking, before writing his reply.

‘Considering that I have been here for almost three years, it is probably time for me to start seeing this as my home. I miss Hashirama, as well as several others in the village, but I have my work and research, this is a good place.’

Set down from this response, most likely there as an afterthought, Tobirama had written more: ‘Besides, Miaka is happy here, as well as her daughter Yukina. I would not like to leave them.’

Dropping that note as if it had burnt him, Madara felt as if there was no air in the room. Throwing open the window he threw himself out of it and up onto the roof, startling the guard stationed there. Pausing to look over the village, heart beating like a drum and feeling dizzy, Madara could feel the guard on the roof watching him. Sending a glare in the Nara’s direction, not wanting to be watched, Madara launched himself toward the cliff face behind him and up onto the elevated foothill above the cliffside. 

Stopping above the carving of Hashirama’s face Madara looked out over the village. The great wall was almost completed but he couldn’t see it, black spots were dancing in front of his eyes and he could feel his heart beating like it was going to burst from his chest.

Less than a minute later, Hashirama landed next to him. His chakra was up, and he was scanning the area looking for a threat. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

Madara turned and looked at his friend’s back as the other man turned and ran his eyes over the village, looking for whatever had set Madara off.

“Madara?”

“Who’s Miaka?” Madara croaked, he almost didn’t recognize his own voice.

Hashirama turned to look at Madara with furrowed brows, “what?”

“Miaka. Who’s Miaka?”

“I don’t…, what? Madara, is there something wrong?”

Madara’s gut was clenching as he stood there, hand braced over his stomach, “I asked Tobirama if he was ever going to come back to the village. He said he didn’t want to leave Miaka. Who’s Miaka, Hashirama!”

Hashirama paled at Madara’s question. “O-oh, no one, Madara!” he forced a laugh and put his hand up to scratch the back of his head. Hashirama was extremely bad at lying to those that he is close to.

“Your brother is staying for this woman! Do you even know who she is!” Madara was feeling out of control, he didn’t know why.

“No, no. Madara. You don’t have to worry about that! Miaka is a Senju, she lives there, with Tobirama.”

“What?” Madara could barely get the question out.

“You’ve never met her; she left the clan before the peace. Tobirama bought his house at the capital for her to live in.”

Madara didn’t remember any more of the conversation after that. He somehow got home that night, but he doesn’t know how. His gut was churning, he must have eaten something bad at lunch, because he was dizzy and couldn’t seem to catch his breath. Going to bed early that night, he stared at the patterns of light on the ceiling above his bed for hours unable to sleep.

***

Madara was unable to stop thinking about it. This woman, who was a Senju, who Tobirama had bought a house for. He’d never heard of her! Tobirama had never mentioned her even though they were living together. Years of letters and this was the first he’d heard of her.

Walking through the village Madara couldn’t help but look at the Senju women he passed. Did Miaka look like one of them? The Senju were much more varied than the Uchiha. Was she brown haired or black, or was she blond like a few of the Senju were? Was her skin pale, like Tobirama’s, or was she dark, like Hashirama? Who was she, why had she left the clan? Why was she living with Tobirama, what was his relationship to her?

Over the next few weeks Madara used the distraction of the coming festival to ask questions. Walking the village more than usual as he surveyed the security, he tried to find out about this ‘Senju Miaka,’ he had never heard of before. It was difficult and he still didn’t have a reason why Tobirama didn’t want to leave her. Mentioning or asking about Miaka got a strangely mixed reaction from the few Senju he spoke to. From a few talkative Senju he learned that she had been a child when she left the clan, that something had happened to her on her first mission, they didn’t know what, and she had left. But then there were the other Senju, people he had worked with before without problem, who had gotten angry at Madara’s questions. Who had told him to stop asking, that he didn’t need to know anything about her, just that she was gone.

The picture he was getting was frustrating and still not answering the questions he wanted it to. He didn’t know why this was so important, but it was! Who was she? And why did he care?

“Who the hell is Senju Miaka, and why do I care!”

Madara didn’t even realize he had been grumbling out loud when he heard a loud clatter and something falling against his open door. Looking up he took in the sight of a pale Hikaku staring at him from the door, spilled box full of mission scrolls at his feet. Staring back at his cousin in question, he slowly switched to aggravation as Hikaku just stood there in the doorway _staring_. “What!” the question was barked out.

Hikaku started before hastily bending to gather all the scrolls he had dropped. Putting the box down on the floor where Madara placed the non-emergency paperwork he needed to go through, Hikaku made an obviously fake hurried excuse before rushing to leave.

“What the hell was that all about?” Madara grabbed his hair and vigorously scrubbed his scalp, “aargghh! I don’t care! I’m going home!”

Leaving his work behind, Madara locked his office and went home. _I’m not thinking about this anymore!_


End file.
